Holy Sh*t did I just tell you all that?
Welcome to our blog.
My name is Hayley Loewen. I live in Vancouver, Canada with my soulmate husband Mark, our 2.5 year old miracle daughter Willow, and our many pets. Living my dreams as the owner of I Am Blessed Mala Beads, an Intuitive Life Coach, and a Yoga Teacher feeds my souls beyond measure. But it wasn't always sunshine and lollipops.
For a long time I did not live my truth. I lived through others “should's”. You “should” do this. You “shouldn't” do that. You “should” buy this. You “should” live like that. You know what I am talking about, right?
I listened to all the “should's” and I am not exaggerating. Here are some of the “should's” I listened to:
You shouldn't be a Marine Biologist. You're not smart enough (high school counsellor)
You should try cocaine, it will help with your confidence (was addicted to it from 15-17)
You shouldn't eat that, you look too good being skinny (So I became bulimic)
You should get married and have babies (I've been divorced twice and had 6 miscarriages)
You should be a nurse (a career that drove me bat shit crazy)
So as you can see, living others “should's” may have not been the best idea.
Wow! I gave you lots of personal info there, hey? But I feel the need to be transparent so you know exactly what drove me to where I am now.
When I was a kid I was very intuitive, could see auras, and was very sensitive to energy (an empath). My parents, teachers and coaches didn't understand me. I felt isolated, misunderstood and odd. I wanted to fit in so I followed the crowd to feel less alone.
I listened to everyone but myself.
I didn't trust myself, I didn't know how to listen to me, and I didn't feel worthy of a better life. Throughout my life I was so focused on pleasing others that I lost myself completely. I spiralled into the worst depression. I wanted to die!
One of my worst, (or best?) decisions I ever made was going to school to be a psychiatric nurse. Everyone said, “Hayley, you should be a nurse” of course I listened. While working as a nurse I slowly lost what little there was left of me. In a state of total desperation, I felt a call to do an online Yoga class. I figured yoga had to help right? Well, it did. So I did what any “sane” person would do. I quit my high paying, secure job with benefits, and went $17,000 in debt to go full time into yoga teacher training. Totally sane, right? But somehow it was the most sane I had ever been. For the first time, I was finally listening to my intuition. I was listening to ME!
I received my 500 hour yoga teacher certificate in 4 months. My low vibrational energy had shifted into a state of peace, calm and alignment. During my training I noticed people were wearing Mala Beads. People were raving about how their Malas helped them to meditate by focusing on an intention. It sounded fascinating to me. Again I felt the call. Being a creative person, I decided to make one for myself. That was 5 years ago. I now own a successful company called I Am Blessed Mala Beads that I built from the ground up using my intuition to guide me.
I listened to ME!
While making malas, I recite a the specific mantra of that mala to every bead. To me, it was important to infuse every mala with its mantra so when the owner received it they also benefit from this energy. There are 108 beads on a Mala so I was doing a lot of mantra meditations.. Naturally I started to feel my intuition expand even more. I was seeing auras again, and...I felt a call...so I listened.
I started giving intuitive and medium readings to people. It too started to become successful. However, I realized that my call lead me to a realization. A realization that was about to guide me towards my bliss.
I noticed that people would say, “I knew it!” Or “Ugh, why didn't I trust myself” Or “I should've thought of that” What I was seeing was myself in others.
We all have the gift of intuition and we all struggle to listen to it. If we did listen we would finally see, feel, and trust what our truths are. We are constantly guided by others “should's” for us. We get caught up by societal standards, how we were raised, and our own made up stories about ourselves. We may even feel like we know what is best for our lives, but we aren't truly listening, so we end up in a position that is not fully in alignment with our true selves. This was my call. My call to help others develop, listen and trust their intuition so they too can live their purposes in life.
I listened to me, now it's time to listen to you!
Comment below if you followed someone else's “should” and it derailed you from your truth.